He said that he only looks at it to use the function where he can look through it and he can “what if he goes on other sites to look at women?. Last week, i discovered that my bf of 5 yrs is on a dating site called Plenty of Fish. You are afraid of the outcome but it won't do good if you try to ignore it. When they boyfriend is going on POF and such it means he is looking for discreet. You're supposed to be an open book, honest, and trustworthy to your partner. Having a dating site profile online and being active on it is.
What to do when your boyfriend goes on dating websites - Post navigation
Was he active on the online dating sites the first time you were dating? It is really important to know this, because if you were OK with it the first time around, then he probably assumes you do not have a problem with it now. Take a little bit of time and think about how you really feel about this.
Are you just mildly annoyed by this, or is this a more serious issue to you? For example, if you are going to threaten to leave him unless he cancels out all of his online dating accounts, then you should be prepared to really leave him.
On the other hand, if it is just a mild annoyance to you, then it may not even be worth the energy to talk about it with him. The decision on what to say to him is ultimately based on how you feel about the situation. How did you find out that he has been on online dating site? You did not mention this in your question. Did you just stumble onto this information because you share the same computer, or is it more complex than that?
Do you have reason to mistrust your boyfriend? Have you been checking his computer accounts without his awareness? Are you yourself on dating sites and found out through your own account that he has been logged on?
The answer to this question will tell you a lot about how much you and your boyfriend trust each other. The simple message of the above questions for you is that first you need to know more about yourself. I want to share with you that although your question is very short, I get a sense that you do not trust your boyfriend. I believe that trust is the main ingredient for a healthy relationship, and without it, the relationship becomes troublesome and both of the partners suffer.
I believe that once you know more about what you want from your relationship, it is important for you to talk to your boyfriend and clear the mystery of this situation. Open communication is essential for building a trusting and ultimately loving relationship.
When you do talk, make sure you cover these areas: You believe that you are in an exclusive relationship with your boyfriend. The first thing you need to do is to make sure if your boyfriend is under the same impression. For example, does it mean you can still flirt with or even date other people as long as there is no physical intimacy with anyone else, or does it mean completely exclusive? Stay firm and let him know that you need to discuss the issue of his online dating activities, before you can start talking about the issue of how you found out.
Ask him why he needs to continue looking if he is already in a satisfying relationship. I am afraid he is staying with you while looking for something he would perceive as better or more exciting. Let him know what your feelings are about the the situation and what you need from him.
Do not expect him to read your mind. I have been there. So what does it mean and what do you do if you find your boyfriend still on a dating site. The first thing here for you to consider before you start to analyze this to death is what made you check the dating site in the first place? I call it my spidey sense. They are constantly on guard for something to go wrong and checking a dating site for the guy they are dating is part of their ritual.
If this is you, stop right here and please check out the Journey Inward and start doing some inner work. He is keeping his options open. When a man is committed to you he is committed to contributing to your happiness as well. Unless he is a complete idiot, he is aware this would not make you happy. A man committed to you would rather lose his arm than cause you despair.
This may also be a sign to you that you are a lot more invested into him than he is into you. Is he really your boyfriend or has your imagination carried you away in this relationship? They keep these secrets because they fear your emotional reaction. They are pacing the relationship in their own minds to a degree. Bottom line here though is this.
My Boyfriend is Active on Online Dating Sites
When Your Boyfriend is Still on a Dating Site – What to do?
You can confront him or you can downgrade him and pull back from the relationship. Let him know what your feelings are about the the situation and what you need from him.