My husband is an INTJ. Myers Briggs & Marriage: ISFJ & INTJ letters are different, you'll never last in a relationship with that person?. An in-depth analysis of INTJ relationships and INTJs' compatibility with other In order to better understand how INTJs approach dating and romantic . Typically, INTJs aren't as drawn to SJs (ESFJs, ISFJs, ESTJs, ISTJs) as they can be to. Let's look at some of the key factors that could influence your INTJ ISFJ relationship. If there is one area where INTJs are weakest it's in the domain of feelings.
Isfj and intj dating compatibility - Introverted Intuition in INTJ Love & Relationships
Sensors are more past and present focused while Intuitives tend to be more future oriented; This means that Sensors will take references from past experiences and present facts to make a decision, while Intuitives are more likely to take into account future possibilities when doing so.
Sensors may find Intuitives' lack of interest in everyday living and managing household tasks to be frustrating; they don't understand why Intuitives are always 'in their heads', pondering about the deep things of life while they are the ones taking care of the duties of the household. Thinking-Feeling Joys Thinker will be attracted to the Feeler's compassion and warmth toward Thinker and others, which Thinker may find lacking in self.
Feeler is attracted to the objective, tough-minded Thinker who can take and give criticism without taking offense. The Thinker-Feeler partnership will provide all rounded perspectives, considering people, values and logical consequences when making important decisions. Struggles Thinkers may hurt Feelers with their straightforward and sometimes tactless words; Feelers tend to take words personally; so when the Thinker provides negative feedback, it always evokes a larger than expected reaction from the Feeler.
Thinkers may not understand the Feeler's desire for harmony and hence avoidance of conflict. Thinkers often misinterpret Feeler's behavior and deem them complicated. Feelers also tend to show affection much more naturally and sometimes they may feel their Thinking counterparts don't show enough of it; they may feel unfulfilled in the relationship.
Judging-Judging Joys Because both value organization, they are likely to have a neat and tidy household with clear rules and standards, something which both parties will prefer. They are likely also to plan their schedules with each other, with little or no issue with unnecessary last minute changes. They will also appreciate their partner's ability to keep up with the demands of everyday living and stay on top.
They will likely be strong together with budgeting, there will be little or no issues with planning out finances together. Struggles Even though both parties may have standards in the household, they may have very different standards. Because both tend to be opinionated, their arguments and quarrels may be more intense.
Both may refuse to budge on their standards and compromise. Both parties like to settle things; this means that sometimes they may make premature decisions without sufficiently considering their alternative options.
However, personality dynamics are more complex than this. While not necessarily their fault, this should comprise at least as much of their relational attention as trying to see and diagnose problems in their partners. To be fair, accurate self-evaluation can be a problem for all J-types, since their preferred mode of Judging Fe or Te is directed outwardly rather than inwardly. This is one reason why typology can be so useful for INTJs, as well as other types.
One of the hallmarks of Fi is a desire to preserve and defend the uniqueness of the individual. Related to a strong concern for the individual is the Fi desire to aid the weak, helpless, and marginalized of society.
This is why IFPs, for instance, can often be found helping the homeless, working with children with special needs, protecting endangered species, etc. Once we add Fi into the mix, it is not hard to see how INTJs might be attracted, even if unconsciously, to rescuing and fixing those who seem needy or helpless. The relationship then becomes a sort of psychotherapeutic forum, with the INTJ working to analyze, diagnose, and treat his wounded partner.
It zeroes in on the unique features of the individual and grows deeply attached to those qualities. While INTJs may not experience the consistent strength of feeling that FP types do, they are nonetheless influenced by the less conscious workings of Fi, which helps inspire loyalty, love, and commitment.
This makes it a highly alluring function, powerful enough to inspire a fierce and protracted tug-of-war with the dominant function. Money also relates to status, another Se-related desire. They may, for instance, feel forced to perform unfulfilling work that fails to utilize their Ni-Te gifts. Or, they may struggle when the quality of a product or accuracy of information is compromised for the sake of marketability. INTJs also hate having to act before their intuition has prompted them to do so.
All of this can make the work life of INTJs rather miserable as they struggle to find a compromise between their Ni and Se concerns.
Even the idea of compromise can be loathsome to INTJs, since their idealism and perfectionism are so pronounced.
This perfectionism tends to be most acute when they attempt to directly control Se outcomes, such as when making art, performing, or obsessing over money or status. When functioning healthily in Ni, however, they rarely fall into the obsessive grip of perfectionism. With that said, pairing with an SFP rarely brings lasting satisfaction to INTJs, since, as introverts, their wholeness must come from the inside out, rather than vice-versa.
INTJs may also happen upon other NJs in their work settings, especially in scientific, academic, or tech-related fields. Overall, ENTJs may be somewhat preferable, bringing a degree of typological variety to the relationship.
They can simply be themselves and feel comfortable employing their normal modes of communication.
- Extraverted Thinking in INTJ Relationships
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While INFJs are strong in extraverting their judgments, INTJs can be even more so because they lack the peacemaking, people-pleasing, and socially sensitive elements of Fe. Feelers also tend to show affection much more naturally and sometimes they may feel their Thinking counterparts don't show enough of it; they may feel unfulfilled in the relationship.